Dining Disaster Fan Gifts

"Here's to a clean start ..."

'How was the snapper, sir?'

"Of course it tastes like chicken. That's why it's called the 'tuna surprise'."

"Dad's dinner really is melt-in-your-mouth...it's half frozen!"

"Do you want ketchup on your steak too?"

"Don't panic, she'll be back. We lock the washroom windows from the outside."

Okay, let me guess...we're eating baked ham and meat loaf on a bed of fish sticks because you combined all the leftovers...

"Waiter - there's no fly in my soup!"

Jeffrey N.: The Guy who managed to get the lead out of his pants, but they were still the wrong pants.

"The scallops were delicious, but the fork was dismal!"

'Something in the fridge has gone off.'

"The dinner date was a disaster! I realised he was still a "Mama's Boy" when I saw he was expecting me to regurgitate his food..."

"Are you still waiting for the pancake to come down?"

'The molto randy refelled her genoise.'

"I hope you like smoked salmon."

'Please stand by. We have temporary loss of your roast.'

"Captain, this Brie is totally out of control!"

"Say when!"

"Quick! Tiptoe out and phone the Fire Service!"

'Andy STILL hasn't got the hang of spaghetti..'

'Well, lucky you! The chef informs me that his breakfast special today is blackened scrambled eggs!'

Sneezing dragon.

"Iron Chef, my ass!"

'Here we put the emphasis exclusively on the food!'

'You did ask for the wine steward - now grovel, man, grovel!'

'Tell Luigi to be a lottle more careful with the pepper.'

''Honey!...Have you seen the brussel sprout casserole I made for dinner tonight?'

"I'm sorry, the sesame peanut dressing is not agreeing with him."

"Gesundheit!"

"How is everything?"

'I don't understand it. I boiled the steak for 20 minutes!'

'I hope you're satisfied! -- I asked the chef to hurry your order, and he BURNED himself!'

'You must be the new girl.'

'Will there be anything else, sir?'