Dining Decorum Defender Gifts

Pleasant!

"At least try to eat your soup in time with the music."

"The fish sticks here are very good."

"Waiter, can you heat this up? The wild salmon got cold while I was posting it to Instagram."

"Great coffee, Carole."

"Hey, …. what's not to like?"

"Would you like to see the markup?"

"I hope he's wearing pants."

"The catch of the day is halibut. The day it was caught was last Tuesday."

"This time, let's not just fill up on bread."

"The last doggy bag."

'In case of emergency, break glass.'

"If you represent special interests, I can seat you immediately."

"What a slobster."

"Care to support the caterers courtesy campaign?" "Do you mind I'm trying to eat!"

'You are quite right, the soup is cold.'

'Well, at least he doesn't beg at the table.'

'Is there a money back guarantee if the burrito isn't as big as your head?'

"A table for two? Would you like chairs with that, madam?"

I'll have a hamburger.

"So you mean to tell me that this business dinner actually involves business?"

'I was bringing your businessman's lunch, sir, but a Government bureaucrat confiscated it!'

"Now, who ordered the salad?"

"As I told you before, I do not allow smoking in my restaurant..."

"And would you like a divorce with that?"

'What wine goes with rubbery steak and cold vegetables?'

'Your waiter will be happy to point out our organic dishes if sir is feeling particularly gullible.'

"The spaghetti is too al dente!"

"That tasted like s**t. We'll have another order of it."

'Smoking section, please.'

"Too rare, perhaps?"

'It won't be long now, sir. The chef has already sent the chicken a death threat.'