Diner Enthusiast T-Shirts

"There. Fly problem: solved. You need anything else, or can I go back to my break?"

That comes with a side? Okay, I'll have the freedom fries... No scratch that. Give me your poor, your tired, your huddled mashed potatoes.

'Will you two stop saying 'everything tastes like chicken'!'

Choice hellhole

"What do you have that's rich in antioxidants?"

'Don't look so surprised, Al... Bears often wander into town searching for food!'

'One placebo or two, doctor?'

'There ya go...Three coffees, Sure you don't wanna make that a bottomless cup?'

Diner Coffee/Coughy

"I got the idea from them fancy restaurants that cook your food at the table...."

Smoking or non-smoking?

'May I recommend the ketchup '06,sir?'

"My whole life stretches out before me as a series of egg-white omelettes."

'Today's special is yesterday's left-overs.'

'The bill, you're joking! I never used to pay my mum.'

"I'm the chef." "I'm the Health Inspector."

"Welcome to the Short Staffed Cafe serving food like your grandma cooked. Is your grandma busy? We really need a cook."

'.....sunnyside down.'

'Are these eggs fresh enough for you?'

"I like this place. You can get the Early Bird Special all day."

Frank & Ernie's Diner. Today: Yogurt Surprise. We call it "yogurt surprise" because we couldn't read the expiration date on the carton.

"Nothing's special today."

Restaurant. One thing you can still get for a single dollar is the waiter's opinion of you.

Yep, we're out of that, too.

Al's Breakfast Diner. Are those "sprinkles" on your muffin? I certainly hope so!

Al's Diner. Special: Spaghetti. All You Can Eat $3.95. Ernie, don't play with your food unless you're sure you can win.

The only two things I never eat for breakfast are lunch and dinner.

Diner. Out of business. It's been a pleasure serving you. It's very said that "restaurant chain" has a new meaning these days.

Triple no foam soy latte with one-pump vanilla swirl. Diner. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.

"You're always so politically correct."

"I made a bid for the Senate, but this is as far as I got."

"What I really feel like having is ham and eggs."

"I'll have the Blue Plate Special. The ball is now in your court."

"We use the cheapest ingredients and pass the savings on to you."

"The after-dinner mint is the boss's idea. I think it's superfluous."