Digital Medal Collector Pillows

"And now to present you with the uploading of your bitmedals."

Brian was very proud of his dog.

A boy is sat at a desk, with five plaques implying different qualifications he has earned from using social media.

Military Medals

'Why couldn't you throw like that in the game?'

"I guess I was a good shot, because I took down 50 Nazis...all by myself. That's how I got my silver star. Honestly, I don't consider myself a hero. I consider myself lucky."

'I was in a camouflage unit, so this one is for Hide and Seek.'

"The first one is for graduating from basic training. The rest are classified."

"Mom, please! I'm a married woman whose friends have been reviewed favourably by the New York Times."

'I was in the catering corps.'

"Yep, that one does, too." "For heaven's sake, Bob, they all look like fart emojis."

"He wanted a heavily decorated cake for his birthday."

Happy Champion

Jungle Games

War Heros Variety Night (playing a tune on his medals).

"Are you sure he tested negative?"

"IBS isn't all bad. It was largely responsible for me winning 6 sprinting medals in college track."

"Knowing all the weather rock lore doesn't really count toward the weather badge."

And this one i got for properly polishing my medals.

'Son...old soldiers don't die...they just get medal fatigue.'

The Generals medals

'This one is for keeping all the other ones so neatly arranged.'

'For donating half my property to the poor, I'll get the 'Unselfish Millionaire of the Year' medal and a supporting receipt for my allowable expenses!'

'And this one is just today's grocery list from my wife.'

Canadians celebrate first Olympic gold medal.

'This one is for not hinting in T.V. interviews that Burma's pacifists should be send WMPs.'

Vampire laying in his coffin wearing a Smiley badge.

Champions biting their medals

"I wonder if this will count for wood carving badge?"

"And this one is for being faithful to my wife."

'We're confident that morale dips resulting from the recent salary cuts will be offset by the distribution of these smiley face badges to all affected employees.'

'My wife gave me that one for washing the windows.'