Digital Disengager Gifts

"I'm going on a digital-detox, any idea how to stop my online friends from contacting me?

"My granddaughter's first words to me were 'OK, Boomer.' I have no idea what that even means."

'Human Error .. Yet Again.'

Wikipedia...

"You never seem to hear a word I say to you!"

"This is Jim's second speech on how not to make people mad by talking on your phone. I missed his first speech."

"The meaning of life! Have you tried Googling it?"

' I see Brad's playing his new video game again.'

"I'll be answering that question and many more in next week's webinar."

'You can't avoid death...You can't avoid taxes...and you can't avoid having your name on computerized mailing lists.'

"Cruel punishment – they took away my smart phone. I had to watch TV."

"I'd like the view better if I hadn't forgot my bleeper"

Trying to come up with yet another password...

'Careful with this next patient. He's not very litigious but he is a prolific online reviewer.'

'Look, I just expect more from a muse.'

"All this mold is a good sign that our marketing content is getting a little stale."

'Dad, how old were you when you started noticing HD?'

A businessman suffering from data overload.

'That's why your checkbook balance looks so good. You sent all of your online bills to the junk file.'

"Now that you have eaten from the tree of information technology..."

Man: 'What the...?!' / 404 ERROR!

'The meaning of life? Let me Google that for you.'

"Not so much fun being people-watched back, eh?"

"I'm going to e-mail you this op-ed about how your generation is ruining everything."

'Darling, I've just deleted the computer,'

"The end is near." "Ya think?"

"Instead of chanting 'Aum' can I keep texting 'Good Morning?'"

"I thought you were supposed to be user-friendly!"

"I dropped my phone in the water. Order some rice."

"Tweet? I don't think so."

“So much for Google Maps.”

"What's to prevent some total stranger anywhere on the world from paying my bills."

Please stand by we have temporarily lost our picture.

"Yes, this is technically a line. But when I said I wanted to be 'online' all day, this isn't what I meant."

'Put away that damned smartphone!'