Digital Disconnect Gifts

Hell has no wi-fi.

"My granddaughter's first words to me were 'OK, Boomer.' I have no idea what that even means."

"I'd like a week off without any business related e-mail on my home computer."

"Nature speaks to me of God’s presence, yet God is a total stranger to the restless world of men." "Why the #!@* is there no signal?!"

"It takes a few days for them to detox from screens."

'It was only 500 yds across but as he visualised the GPS blind spot the risks seemed immense.'

"The pandemic has pushed us to revolutionize how we connect."

"Behold, Penny. The 'Wi-Fi dead zone.'"

"I'd like the view better if I hadn't forgot my bleeper"

"She thinks she might need glasses since she keeps losing people she tries to follow on social media."

'I'm sorry my social needs are changing & I need to upgrade.'

"Have we e-met before?"

So good to meet you, Facebook to Facebook.

Man: 'What the...?!' / 404 ERROR!

"Not so much fun being people-watched back, eh?"

'For an interactive experience press the off button now.'

'You say you have people skills yet you have only two Facebook friends. I find that troubling.'

'Social networking, huh? We used to call that a party line.'

"The end is near." "Ya think?"

"I don't carry business cards. Just scan my QR code and go directly to my website."

'Follow me on your favorite social media website (Just look up 'beggar').'

'Jenny.Schwartz@procom.net...meet Andrew626@aol.com.'

"No cell phone, no e-mails... boy, I've never felt so free1"

“So much for Google Maps.”

"I cancelled the cable, turned off the phone, shut down the internet... where the hell am I??"

"Unfortunately all his friends were just on Facebook."

"Yes, this is technically a line. But when I said I wanted to be 'online' all day, this isn't what I meant."