Digital Detractor Pillows

Supermarket Self Service Checkout

'I didn't get your message because I'm letting my voice mailbox fill up.'

Breaking News: Earth Crosses Multiple Lanes, Crashes into Sun... Distracted Orbiting to Blame.

Screen Time vs Book Time

"Nature speaks to me of God’s presence, yet God is a total stranger to the restless world of men." "Why the #!@* is there no signal?!"

"You think you have problems? My entire wing command was just destroyed."

"DID YOU SEND THIS?"

'How are we supposed to think the unthinkable if we have to drink the drinkable?'

"I'm just saying, if you had to turn off the TV, would you still remember how?"

'You can't avoid death...You can't avoid taxes...and you can't avoid having your name on computerized mailing lists.'

"I am in the moment - just not the moment you're in."

EEEEEEEEEEEE-Mail

'Will this job requirer me to look up from my phone?'

'Look, I just expect more from a muse.'

'I believe in living life to the fullest.'

Diving Judge: Sorry, I Was Looking At My Phone.

"Not so much fun being people-watched back, eh?"

"I am doing my homework, but it's hard not to get distracted in this click-bait media environment."

'I'm busy flinging birds at pigs, go away.'

"I thought you were supposed to be user-friendly!"

Facebook - You have 17 requests to get on with your work.

"Am I the only one who can see that sign?"

"My life is one unending pop-up ad."

'The doctor will see you shortly. He has a few hundred email jokes he has to forward.'

"hey fans! im at bat,. btm 9th, bases loaded, score tied--oops, jst got called strike1!"

"Hang on...I think you're losing me."

'Can't you take out the trash, Mom? ? I'm busy deleting junk e-mail.'

"My husband fell into the bear enclosure! I threw my phone down there. I think it bought him some time."

"What?"

This P.C. has been porn free for 23 days

"I bet the decline in the U.S. birth rate is thanks to Wordle."

"Can I call you back? I'm shopping."

Health and Safety man on mobile about to fall down manhole.

"Don't worry. As soon as Junior learns enough words, he'll tell you how to work it."