Digital Chatter Pillows

'I really don't miss the water cooler.'

'Let's go somewhere where we can text each other.'

'You skimmed my tweet.'

"This is Donald. Donald's a friend. Not a real friend-just a Facebook friend."

21st century water cooler conversations.

"Jackie, why does your relationship status read ‘capitulated to’ me?!"

"They communicate through clicks and taps."

'He's not talking yet, but his texting skills are excellent...'

"Could you please focus on the objective of this meeting, Tom... you can get back to your 300 followers later."

"Did you get my tweet?"

"Textin’"

"The man who invented autocorrect died from the corona vibrator."

"We hardly ever intercept hard copy notes anymore, Stanley."

'Stop emailing me, I am standing right here.'

Spam in Hell.

"Ugh—someone in the group chat must have seen a squirrel."

'Hey! I sad, 'You've got mail!''

The Mating Call of the Modern Youth

"Instead of wagging my tail, running around and jumping all over you, I sent you an E-card."

So, if you don't get this mail because I wrote the wrong address again, please reply to me a.s.a.p. Best, Bob

Aluminium Henge

"Give her some space! She's overdosing on baby talk!"

'The smart phone is amazing you can contact anybody in the world.'

"Siri meets Alexa" "What can I help you with?" "I'm sorry, I can't answer that."

"Don't talk to me in your 'Hey Siri' voice."

'Thanks mum, it's just what I always wanted!'

"Go ahead—unmute yourself."

"Outta my way. I need to check my email!"

"I'm so overloaded with emails, just one monitor wasn't enough to handle them all."

"I'll have to get someone younger to look at your résumé. I'm not fluent in emoji."

"At least their bull sessions are green. Everything they say is 100% biodegradable."

"There's nothing wrong with her. With e-mail, texting and tweeting, she just hasn't needed to learn to talk."

Do your emails stand out from the rest?

"You text LOL, but you have yet to actualize LOL..."