Digital Age Ponderers Gifts

"Gramps, you were alive before everyone knew what you were doing on social media... What was that called?" "Bliss!"

"The selfie of Dorian Gray"

"I don't post selfies because I don't want people to feel better or worse about their looks."

"They didn't want to be identified in my photo, so I blurred their butts."

"The low-res JPEG of Dorian Gray"

'Okay, found you. Now let's open the 'Review' link...'

"We're making a video of us watching TV so we can watch ourselves watching TV...later."

"We no longer have to hide. Bigfoot hunters now only search for us online. It's going to be lonely around here."

'Can you just send the digital copy?'

"I wasn't copying off others. I was just crowdsourcing the answers."

Please stand by...I have temporarily lost my reason.

"If you prayed to Google instead of God, you might get a constructive response."

"No, it's not codependency. The neediness is just in one direction."

'It's a book, Sweetie - it doesn't have any ram!'

"You text LOL, but you have yet to actualize LOL..."

To get past the gates of Heaven you have to now enter an internet style password

'I've got a highspeed connection and I get spam... therefore I am!'

''The Thinker' is an outdated concept.'

After the summer holidays

"Free why-fi.”

Moses comes down the mountain with the first silicon chip.

"Of course it sends your message digitally. If you want analogue we'll have to saddle up old Bessie."

"You've got to learn to love yourself. Start by 'Friending" yourself on Facebook."

Better Living Through Technology

'You have a friend request.'

Fortune-teller: 'AHH, what the...?!'

"When I was a kid there was no internet. If you wanted to bully someone, you had to do it to their face."

"I'm basically happy but I'd like a most cost-effective personality."

What's 'Bitcoin'?

"What's the point of school? We can just look all this stuff up on wikipedia."

Evolution in the Era of the Selfie