Diet Rebel Gifts

'After 25 years of research we've concluded that you should just eat, drink and be merry.'

Health food.

'Ahh...now there's a man who understands women.'

"No, I haven't heard that broccoli was on the endangered species list."

'Better to have loved chocolate and lost a diet than never to have loved chocolate at all...'

Any time is cake o'clock

'I've decided to give up giving up!'

'Notice: results of new studies: most of what was good for you is bad for you - most of what was bad for you is good for you'

"Medical reports say we all die sooner or later. So eat what you wish."

"I've finally found a diet I stick to. When you get hungry, you eat."

"I've been battling my weight for years, so today I'm finally surrendering."

'I've tried that. It works.'

Diet Enforcer

"I think the problem is that you're not eating properly..."

"If you're as smart a refrigerator as they say you are, you'll keep your mouth shut about this."

"Heck with my diet. If I have to run in this rat race, I'm eating some cheese!"

"Cream coloured ponies, crisp apple strudels, doorbells and sleighbells, schnitzel with noodles. . ."

'I always shop here. They don't sell low fat ice cream so the guilt is gone.'

"Vegetables may be good for my body, but my soul craves chocolate."

'To hell with dieting...who's gonna care twenty million years from now?'

Dieting is for losers.

'Don't be tempted, Mrs. Gruber, just mail those apple fritters right here to me!'

'Headmaster I'd like to report Biggins and Small who were caught this morning consuming trans-fats behind the bicycle shed.'

'Better to have loved chocolate and lost a diet than to have not loved chocolate at all...'

"I just thought maybe we should consider letting ourselves go now instead of waiting a few years into our marriage."

'The good news is you don't have to worry about cholesterol, carbs, or trans fat.'

Attempting to eat your own bodyweight in cake can act as a mood enhancer.

"I thought you were trying to go carb-free?"

What can I get you? Ham sandwich with extra cheese. Double banana split. Side of sugar. Coming up, sir. I am abandoning my New Year's diet! If you're gonna go down, go down in flames. Burn these gym clothes!

'Put an egg in the bowl and beat it with the whisk.'

'Personally I take all these programmes with a pinch of salt.'

'I ran out of sugar, so I used salt.'

"'TSP' stands for 'teaspoon' not 'two solid pounds'!"

Recipes from the Jean-Paul Sartre Cookbook

"I remember his last words were, 'Another bite and I'll burst!'..."