Devilishly Good Friends Pillows

'We've got the neighbours from hell.'

"Must we have ten minutes blasphemy every night?"

"I used to be a medium, but now I'm a large."

'So much for dogs looking like their owners'

'It's your turn to put the cat out.'

'Okey, suit yourself but I saw the library book move.'

'Be careful. The plate is hot!'

Big man on Krampus

"So much for eternal rest."

"You'll be in charge of the music down here."

Swelling

'You're nuts! It isn't any hotter than usual so quit brining up global warming!'

'You do realize that's just a giant novelty fork, right? They used to have one in the restaurant where I worked.'

"I don't think I'm quite ready for Satan sings the blues!"

Golfer's Hell.

Heck Support.

"Are you coming in, it's lovely and warm?"

"Amid all the chaos, I'm just grateful to have a job where I can work from home."

'Oh good! I hate long lines.'

Devil Stove

'No wonder it's so warm! Someone's been messing with the thermostat again!'

'At last, an ethics committee that will listen to reason!'

"Talk for all of eternity, just $29 a month."

Optimist in Hell.

"When I said, 'Keep the wine at room temperature'...I didn't mean here!!"

"Shouldn't we be into soul music?"

101 uses of a dead cat: saw

"You wanted a 'useful idiot' so we gave you Trump. . . what's the problem?"

'Oh go ON - I love a bit of gossip.'

'Is it my fault they didn't send me to obedience school?'

"I should've never taught you to shake."

The Hades Tonight Show. No, I don't think you need to send out a comedian first to warm up the studio audience.

Some people don't know whent to quit.

"I can't eat anything spicy."

"Look. . . I know that you think I'm a idiot, but I'm not a complete idiot!"