Detective Show Lover T-Shirts

"He's claiming that he was only the armed robber's intern."

Trial by Media

'I remember when you used to look for answers using your astute powers of deduction.'

Joan Hickson

'Gosh, really? You've never been on any reality show at all?'

"And by president we mean the one on Saturday night tv, not the real one. He kinda sucks."

The mysterious Sherlock Holmes - 'Is he wearing his cap backwards or forwards?'

'A sitcom has to be quirky or formulaic. There is no middle way.'

'I'm sure that the autopsy will confirm it was a suicide.'

"I'm Lester Holt, and this, is date night."

"Spoiler alert."

"I'll be glad when the television is fixed."

'It's a program on paranoia. Every time I leave the room, they stop and wait for me to come back.'

Sherlock Holmes with a magnifying glass.

'Keep an eye on that one. He looks like a sketchy character to me.'

"No Hand Sanitiser"

"You think you're gonna whack me and this will be over?"

"... and I would have gotten away with it if it weren’t for you meddling forensic pathologists."

Menopause and the City

"I'm sorry- when you said 'bad' cop, I assumed you meant incompetent."

"He did it!"

Newton's Law and Order.

Mystery Writing 101 - Mailbox: The butler did it, the gardener, the chauffeur.

A spy

Clownton Abbey

"You're under arrest for an attempted murder."

'It's Yorick all right - I know his DNA well.'

Parachuting with Concrete Shoes

'Don't you people ever take a pulse? ! '

'Would you believe, all this is just part of a new reality show?'

"Anything in Mr, Rogers' neighborhood?"

"Cut. Cut. You call this a crime scene?"

"Law & Order: Museum Guards."

Alan Davies.

"C-Span is our reality television."