Desk Job Veteran Gifts

'Shouldn't you be wearing pants?'

Computer Jobs

A paperwork machine spews endless paperwork

On his desk, a cat has an in box, out box and litter box.

"I wonder if A.I. will inevitably become as tired and depressed as we are."

Out and In.

Storm in the out tray

Working hours.

'Germaine, what did you do with my desk?'

'Can I call you back, Frank? A giant maggot is eating my desk, people are shooting at me and my hair is on fire.'

"Since you somehow managed to get past my moat, I'll give you a few minutes."

"Yes, also it keeps you fit."

'ACE Heating and cooling' 'What's Hot' 'What Not'

'On your marks. Get set. Go!' - 'Come on! Keep going! You can do it!' - 'Yay! You're 8 hours closer to the grave!' - 'Oh, God.'

"Memo to self - personalise new work-station."

"Of course I have a life. Not one worth living, mind you."

Working 9 to 5.

'When will I be old enough to have my own people?'

"Does it count it after an 80 hour week he's here in body but his mind is off in La La land?"

Man in office on saddle: 'You heard right. I just got hired as a desk jockey.'

'My multi-tasking turned into faulty-tasking.'

Inkwell Genie.

Spam in inbox.

"Sorry for the wait, our computers are down. We have to do everything manually."

Information. Innuendo

'What does L.B.W. mean?'

'Remember when we used desktop computers? When everyone at least 'looked' busy?'

'Hard day at work, dear?'

'Only another thirty-four years, five months and fourteen days until I retire.'

'Remember, Preston, all work and no play make you employed.'

"The first of many cubicles..."

"Now that you mention it, I have to admit, the daily grind IS starting to get to me!"

Boxes marked 'In', 'Out' and 'How did this end up on my desk?'

'Too long at his desk...we're going need surgery to cut him free.'

'Being taller than me will get you nowhere.'