Designated Drivers Gifts

'No thanks. I don't drink when I'm driving home a point.'

"Why am I always the designated driver?!"

Boozing and Cruising

Someday

Vicar's driving lesson "Here endeth the first lesson!"

Route 666.

'When I drink, I don't drive my car.'

Heavy Traffic.

"Darling, I'll drive tonight so that you can have a drink..."

'I'm drinking, you're driving - how come you're so happy?'

"This one contains our tailgating deterrent feature."

For every dog who gets the window seat, there's Steve, the designated driver.

"Thank goodness for rear-engine cars!"

"I'm the designated driver."

Gas eyedropper.

No Car Bar.

Danger: Reading warning signs costs lives.

I've stopped you so often I've decided to give you a season ticket!

'Now that Sir has approved the wine, would Madam care to taste the water?'

"It's O.K., I've got his car keys."

'Another short-cut, dear?'

GPS: 'Sorry return to the main road.'

Gas bar, Full service/Self-serving tightwads

'With all the cars being stolen these days, I went out and bought the strongest security system I could afford.'

How was my emergency stop?

'Now I know why this Satnav was going out cheap.'

Nerds night out: 'Dibs on Designated Driver.'

'Pub drinking games with bottled water may be sensible, but they're bloody boring.'

"Just accept the ticket and let's go. The hot dog's getting cold."

"Dry cleaning, pet store, Salvation Army - I'd be lost without my stickies on the dash!"

"Customers without designated drivers must be wearing clean underwear."

'Why do they call it rush hour when no one goes anywhere?'

Baby kangaroo has a seatbelt on.

Parking

"I don't care how it works where you come from....on this planet, the designated driver is the one who 'doesn't' drive!"