Dental Comedy Fan Gifts

Dr. Morton believed he had found a less upsetting way to give his patients Novocain shots.

Open Wide The Dentist's View.

'As a matter of fact, I do prefer red wine to white. How did you ever guess?'

"Pollyanna, your teeth are shot. Stop sugar coating everything!"

"Right now, grandmom's bark is definitely worse than her bite!"

1688: Pirate Dentistry - "Say ARR!"

"FYI that the novocaine will numb the pain caused by the drill but won’t help with the pain caused by the overhead adult contemporary music."

Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord my soul to keep and with the sun if I've found death, please excuse my morning breath.

I see braces in his future.

'I'm worried: He doesn't have buckteeth...'

'Mind that molar, careful of that canine...'

Dentist in ashes - 'Have you been eating garlic?'

'Stop! Wait 'til he finishes cleaning my teeth!'

"You've been grinding your fangs."

Dentist Speak - Monologues

"I had them sharpened so I can eat cows."

"Remove your shoes and socks. We ran out of laughing gas"

"It's teeth whitening."

Dentist Suction

"Needs ketchup."

'Maybe you should stay away from dental humour.'

'Open wide.' 'Your wallet.'

"And then I said 'Don't worry, this is perfectly safe!' Ha, ha!"

'Did the nasty man hurt you?'

Dentist: We drill/Fill/Bill.

F&E Dentistry. Happy Halloween. That pumpkin doesn't have any teeth! He never brushed --- It's a plaque-o-lantern.

"Thanks, Doc- you've put me back in business."

Licensed to drill.

'Two cavities, that's not so bad. But I only have three teeth'

"Of course, I would suggest a shot of novacaine."

"You're not a gift horse, are you?"

'I need you to open wide, Peel.' - 'Ahhh.' - 'Not your mouth, fool! Your wallet.' - 'Arghhh!' - 'Wider!' - 'Argh!'

'You really should Floss.'

"That's a nasty cavity. That is why it is so important to brush your hair."

'I had no idea floss could be used like that!'