Dental Comedian Gifts

'They should be nice and clean -- my mother washes my mouth out with soap every @#$%@#$ day!'

"What do I suggest for tight glutes? For best results, squeeze from the bottom."

"Right now, grandmom's bark is definitely worse than her bite!"

Tooth fairy

1688: Pirate Dentistry - "Say ARR!"

"Aperitif?"

'Tony can't come out to play now, he's on his orthodontopole!'

The songwriter who wrote a bridge about his bridge.

"Have you ever considered getting braces?"

Dentist Trip

'...your teeth are putting on weight.'

The New Age Dentist.

I see braces in his future.

"FYI that the novocaine will numb the pain caused by the drill but won’t help with the pain caused by the overhead adult contemporary music."

Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord my soul to keep and with the sun if I've found death, please excuse my morning breath.

'I'm worried: He doesn't have buckteeth...'

'It's a British car. Needs braces.'

Dentist as psychoanalyst with tooth patient on couch

"No, we haven't started yet. My hand was cold."

"I'll take your word for it. You don't have to show me your used floss."

'At least you're not going to have to worry about your denture adhesive anymore.'

Dentist in ashes - 'Have you been eating garlic?'

'Do you offer transcend dental medication?'

"Remove your shoes and socks. We ran out of laughing gas"

Steven Tyler's toothbrush.

"Have a seat. She's not ready. She's still in her whitening strip."

Dr. Morton believed he had found a less upsetting way to give his patients Novocain shots.

"It's teeth whitening."

"And then I said 'Don't worry, this is perfectly safe!' Ha, ha!"

'Maybe you should stay away from dental humour.'

"And here we have the complete skull of an orthodontosaurus."

"Needs ketchup."

As it turns out, Sabre-tooth tigers didn't actually go extinct, they just ran into this guy.

'Oh, he's just my son here for bring your kid to work day.'

'Open wide.' 'Your wallet.'