Dental Humor Fan Gifts

Duck visits the dentist,

"Remove your shoes and socks. We ran out of laughing gas"

'Nothing dentured, nothing gained.'

"Of course, I would suggest a shot of novacaine."

Walrus brushing its teeth.

Getting there is half the fun. Unless it's a trip to the dentist. Then it's all the fun.

'So that's why babies don't have teeth.'

Yeah, you've got a firefly stuck between your teeth, Bob.

'Instead of me continually replacing your caps, Tom... why not just get new shocks on your car?'

I try to brush and floss between meals and snacks. Just wondering, is floss considered a snack?

'Come on boy... give daddy his dentures back!'

'And do you promise to tell the tooth, the whole tooth, and nothing but the tooth so help you God?'

You don't have to pay me yet! I know, I'm counting my money before you give me gas!

Art and Dental Exhibits

"Lunch break."

"You want a local anesthetic? Okay, our receptionist will tell you endless stories about her grandchildren."

'My, what large dentures you have, Grandma.'

A smile too far...

'Not you again.' He's bitten the dentist.

Da Toot' Fairy

Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord my soul to keep and with the sun if I've found death, please excuse my morning breath.

"Pollyanna, your teeth are shot. Stop sugar coating everything!"

"Right now, grandmom's bark is definitely worse than her bite!"

1688: Pirate Dentistry - "Say ARR!"

"FYI that the novocaine will numb the pain caused by the drill but won’t help with the pain caused by the overhead adult contemporary music."

I see braces in his future.

'I'm worried: He doesn't have buckteeth...'

'It's a British car. Needs braces.'

'Mind that molar, careful of that canine...'

Dentist as psychoanalyst with tooth patient on couch

Dentist Speak - Monologues

"You've been grinding your fangs."

'Stop! Wait 'til he finishes cleaning my teeth!'

"I had them sharpened so I can eat cows."

Dentist in ashes - 'Have you been eating garlic?'