Dental Care Jester Gifts

'Someone must have called him yellow again.'

'Cut down on sodium? I'm taking that with a pinch of salt.'

"I give up. Where's the patient?'

"You say you're flossing, but I'm scraping off a lot of tennis ball fuzz."

Dentist Trip

Things you forgot to tell me about getting older: "You're going to need bigger tooth floss."

'You can have general anesthesia or just be numbed from the wallet down.'

'There's been unexpected complications involving your husband's bill.'

"I'll take your word for it. You don't have to show me your used floss."

Surgeon Finds Heart Reading 'Be my Valentine'.

"I've decided to be an organ donor."

"Do you carry generic placebos?"

'Open your mouth and say 'Ah' -- I'm going to try some anti-virus software.'

'Open it... I think they have to go potty.'

"We're trying to save your husband."

'Um ... no - I said we'll need a stool sample.'

'Dont' operate any rocks or sticks while you're using this medication.'

Nurse cautioning a patient

"I can catch-you can't throw."

'I wouldn't wait too long, for a limited time banks are offering low interest loans on coronary bypass surgery.'

"....And Mother Yancy will be assisting the reattachment team this morning..."

The last 'take your mother to work' day.

'You can tell the age of a horse by the teeth...but who wants to bite a horse.'

'You mean medical science hasn't come up with a cure for common cooties?'

CLINIC, 'Are you worried about passing your blood test?', 'Heck, no -- anybody can BLEED.'

"Hold it. I'd like a second opinion!"

'I stopped taking the medicine because I prefer the original disease to the side effects.'

'Actually, the loud ringing has stopped, now I hear knocking.'

'Whoa, hey, guys! Where are you going?! I was just brushing my teeth, see!'

Toothpaste Marketing Department

You only get your tonsils out once. Milk it.

"Business or Pleasure?"

'Reflexes Normal.'