Degree Debunker Pillows

Welcome! University of Hard Knocks...Where common sense is better than smarts!

'I have this fear of the real world...'

A boy is sat at a desk, with five plaques implying different qualifications he has earned from using social media.

'So what are you studying, young man?'

"Do you think the flat earth society has members round the globe?"

'I tried to warn him - garbage in, garbage out.'

'Care to join in some of my avoidance behaviour?'

"Damn. These must have shrunk in the wash." "I don't think so."

"I've been studying reverse psychology at Tonga Tech Online University."

"We thought we could put in the details later."

'So, in college what did you major in' - 'Business poetry.'

Useful Degrees:"Bachelor of Waitressing

'I didn't know 'Businessish Management' was something you could get a degree in.'

'I'm sorry - Mr. Jenkins, MBA, PhD, MD, Esq. is O.U.T.'

'Thanks, I started collecting diplomas when I was seven.'

"I'm sorry, sir, but this survey does not allow for that opinion."

"You put PhD on birth certificate?!" "It's never to early to give em an advantage."

Frank was right not to trust statistics...the numbers lie!

" No, I'm not concerned about my weight...why worry about something you can't see?"

WHEW!

Out-tray Paper Aeroplanes

'What makes you think you're so smart?'

'...You've got no game.'

"Market Research will now tell us what we want people to tell us."

"We took everything that was nice and got rid of it."

"Grandma, if an apple-a-day really did keep the doctor away... the surgeon general would find that apples cause cancer!"

'I think educated guesses are useless; they're nothing but I-don't-knows with a degree.'

Pay Inactivity Fee $20.

"Two plus two makes four?! Only if you still cling to the outmoded and stereotypical worldview of the patriarchy."

REPORT CARD, 'Maybe my teacher just isn't teaching math right -- she IS a girl, after all.'

"The United States is lower than most countries... We're lower than the world!"

"You wanted me to go to that small college..they've gone out of business, and me degree was recalled."