Defeatism Aficionado Gifts

"Doing something never solves anything."

Like lambs to the slaughter, my ass.

"It's a jungle out there... and I hear you're an expert."

The life of penguins.

'If elected, I promise to my darndest to keep money in politics.'

'The Board's meeting at nine O'clock - you bring the smoke, I'll bring the mirrors.'

"Here's the weak point."

"Today U.S. Defense Industry stocks rose on news Dick Cheney endorsed Donald Trump."

"Yeah, I won the Finest Quality Wool award, but it was a tough competition: There were contestants from all over Australia and New Zealand..."

'Oh, now that's a nice vase...'

'Every time I win an argument, he goes off on a Crusade to sulk.'

"Of course failure is an option; I use it all the time!"

"No, it's not real, but it does wonders for school bus discipline."

How to throw your voice: 'I am guilty. I did it. I confess.'

'The contest brought in only twenty two wrappers...'

"How about that! Wanda, you also landed on cheese."

Builders fighting over projects.

"Looks like we've taken care of the enemy and pretty much everything else."

Defensive EU

Executives are evaluated in Dancing With The Stars style.

"You took your time!"

'No, I thought you were John Simpson.'

"What? The invitation said, wear your favorite mask."

"We spent the summer on the Côte de Jersey."

The Last Powerpoint

Beginning fires for the winter - Something wrong with the chimney.

"Could you access your online dictionary for the definition of 'sayonara'?"

"I'm trying to decide between a cocktail with a cute name and one that's blatantly sexual."

Sorry You Were Out - Will Call Again.

Marvo The Magician - "Don't disappear your tea's nearly ready."