Decorating A New Home Gifts

"We're looking for something for our panic room."

I'm looking forward tot he day we can afford some real statues for this place.

"Thanks to the Oscars, we're going to be the hottest finger food this season."

Let's get organized

Domestic Superheroes!!

"Boil, toil and trouble, I wish I'd never started this risotto."

LAY ZEE FUK

Barbequer wears apron with 'Beer in -beer out' slogan.

"He's got no clue how easy he has it compared to his ancestors."

Lady of the Cake.

"You haven't got dyslexia- the instructions are in polish."

"Maybe we should cut back on those lawn catalogues."

"Whenever he shows up everything turns to crap!"

'Maybe we should have gone for a pommel horse.'

"The kids love it, and it's saved my marriage."

"Great cruise except the zip lining got flooded."

'I couldn't stand the heat, so I got out of the kitchen.'

The wonderful world of cheese.

'Honey, where's my cell phone?'

'Fine stencilling. But have you never thought - Tit Willow, Tit Willow, Tit Willow?'

'Make sure you pretend to water it.'

'The plumber said he can't come right now, but promised to put us on his 'wading list'. Cute, huh?'

Painting by the numbers for adults

'Is that the only wallpaper you could find?!'

Maybe I should have measured my garden before going shopping....

"This is going to make the most amazing driftwood table."

It's a male thing - I saw a toaster with power assist, and I bought it.

Gardener

Allotment

'Good news. I found where the termites have been living.'

"Don't worry - I'm here for the television."

'I used to do that, but it just grows again.'

Second hand furniture.

"And this is our media room."

Beach Barbecue