Decibel Dodger Gifts

Man having thinning hair blasted by cafe speaker.

'No, I'm not stranded. This is the only place I could find that has no distractions.'

"I think before we begin to address me, we need to talk about the clown in the room."

"It's essential I go to work to avoid being with my family."

'You know, this is a pretty dangerous line of work you're in...'

Car with enormous speakers, "I said, I love the speakers!"

Leaf-Blowers: Loudly making yardwork someone else's problem since the 1960s.

Minefield! Thank you for treading carefully.

'Maybe I haven't made myself clear enough. I really don't want to be disturbed today!'

"Truth, whole truth, nothing but the truth? I'm not ready for that much of a commitment."

"Isn't this so much better without our devices?"

"Do you mind? Look what you made me do!"

Trying to come up with yet another password...

'Maybe next concert we should ease up on the volume.'

Psychology: Module 1 . . . . Attention span.

"Are you listening to me?"

'We see a lot of carpal tunnel syndrome caused by repetitious pushing of the tv mute button during the political ad season.'

Soft Speaker, Loud Speaker, Deafening Speaker

'If you don't stop interrupting me with your phone calls, we're never going to finish our face to face meeting.'

"You're suffering from banner blindness."

'That's why your checkbook balance looks so good. You sent all of your online bills to the junk file.'

"If you don't want to know the result of the united game then look away now"

"Yeah, almost didn't make it out of that one."

"If you'd bullshitted your work like the rest of us, you'd be home by now."

'Do you mind? I'm trying to read.'

You are here... ...Run!!!

'Darling, I've just deleted the computer,'

Don't forget to switch off your cellphones.

'The poor lamb's having a rest, Mum, exhausted after putting a new toilet roll on the holder...'

"So I'm thinking...why bother with all the junk mail?"

'After a close examination I think I know why Tabatha keeps wandering onto busy roads.'

Cycling Deaths

"Now that the person chewing gum so loudly has finally stopped, perhaps we can all pay attention to what I'm doing here."

'Phone-b-gone, gets rid of unwanted phones.'

The damage from wearing headphones.