Decade Devotee Gifts

"You remind me of why I found the eighties wanting."

Mike (The Situation) is rumored to have written the original manuscript for his best-selling memoir entirely out of bronzer.

Television Readers.

"First Lady Lettuce goes missing, then Colonel Crouton followed by Reginald Radish... Great Caesar's Ghost! Someone is making a salad!"

This next song goes out to the girl who stole my heart and my guitar.

Industry and Idleness - The industrious apprentice a favourite, and entrusted by his master.

'But I do have fun, I have lots of fun. I have lots of fun making lots of money.'

"'Best wishes'? That's it? That's all you got?!"

'Are you good with decimals? Our certificate of deposit is currently paying 0.025%.'

'Of course we have to learn decimals. How else will we be able to compare bank interest rates.'

"They'd sold out of #1's."

Sir Edmund Hillary Arriving Home To His Third Floor Apartment

"Presenting a Few of New York Curiosities"

'My dad says fractions are obsolete since the stock market moved to decimals.'

Give Thanks.

'Look - forget I asked if you were free any evenings...'

"You said 'give me a cool hairstyle...' You never specified which decade."

Dog with balloon, y-fronts, and party hat

"I would also like to thank the jury for validating my work."

"Who cares? The emperor is really buff."

"That's one 50-gallon drum of shampoo, one 50-gallon drum of conditioner, and one leaf-blower. Sign here."

'Congratulations Perkins! Always first arrived and last to leave. You're on your way to the top.'

John Knox

Rape of the Lock- The Cave of Spleen

"There doesn't seem to be an end to the Eighties revival."

Rudy, Must you keep singing that song...' children in the morning...children in the evening...children at suppertime?

'Ah, Gerald, weddings are so romantic...'

'It's not forgetting things completely that bothers me - it's remembering that I've forgotten to remember something that drives me mad!'

'10 years of loyal service - and this is what I get?'

'That's what I like about you, Abrams, you don't let a little illness keep you off the job.'

'Take five -- I need another cold shower.'

"How you could retire on your teeny 401(k) is not the mystery thriller we're looking for."

"I spent my thirties doing my twenties, but by the time I was in my forties I was doing my forties."

"What? Didn't you know faith could move mountains?"

'Circulation is working hard to keep our business.'