Debut Art Exhibition T-Shirts

'Yes, I'm very excited. I really think that I will make my mark as a surrealist miniaturist.'

"I think that's one of his early 'blank canvases'. I think there are some bigger ones in the next room."

'The way the eyes follow you is uncanny.'

"Well....I could've done this!"

It's a call from Tate modern.

Candle Portraits.

Child's Drawing (With Elephantiasis)

Painting taking root...

Picasso: The Early Years

"I don't know anything about art, but this is a damned good Martini."

'These hors d'oeuvres are real slop, and I mean that in the best sense.'

Creation of Red Wine

"So, Sandra, what can you tell us about your lovely mood board?"

'Hold everything! -- The National Endowment for the Arts changed its mind!'

'I think it's the best thing you've ever done!'

Leaves falling out of a painting.

"Life is too short! Why should I waste my time frantically searching for a mate when I can create art instead..."

"I've just got this sudden craving for pizza."

"This one's called 'Incarceration.'"

'I agree, this artist will go far and he should start right now!'

'Is this any way to treat a budding genius?'

"I read 'Art News.'"

Private Viewing

Dogs looking at a fire hydrant in an art gallery.

'It's like a piece of music, like Mozart or Beethoven.'

"I can deal with the conceptual art and electronic music, but what are these hors d'oeuvres supposed to be."

'You're no Pollock.'

Instant art

"Billy is turning out to be quite the little artist."

"You don't look a day over 30,000."

"An overload -- even this is beginning to look like Kitsch."

'I may not know much about art. But, I don't know what I like either.'

Michelangelo's David is cleaned every two months.