Dealership Humor Gifts

'Sorry. No trade-ins.'

Car dealers free hotdogs - "The best I can do is mustard and relish, ketchup and onions are optional."

"It goes from the factory to us in $29,500."

'I see you've found a cure of the 'new car fever'.'

'And remember delivery is free if it happens in a half hour!'

"The forty thousand dollars includes a rear view mirror!"

It was owned by a little old lady who could make a decision faster than you.

'We found your luggage! It went to Buffalo!'

A horse and cart metamorphosing into a snail.

Used space shuttle

'Our motto is, 'We'll do anything to sell a car!' but he really means it.'

'It goes with your eyes.'

'Would you care for a drink while you're being ignored?'

"Remember, now. Don't buy this car just to please me."

Now the postal strike's off I'm delivering your backlog of junk mail.

"Never mind the transmission and the brakes. Is there a warranty on the horn?"

"Before negotiations begin, we'll soften them up with 15 minutes of cute cat videos."

'Only 5000 miles on the clock.'

He says he'd like his change in Skodas...'

"Thanks again, and I'll be seeing you real soon. Your new car has already been recalled."

"Let's do this in your office. I hate talking shop in the shop."

"This car is very economical on gas. Used hardly any getting over here."

"Frankly, we've been having some problems with this model."

'Oh, I dunno, looks dodgy to me.'

"Bernie's problem is his technique draws attention to itself."

"You guys have sold me wrong parts three times! Your ad says 'Auto y Rod employees are the friendliest experts in town.' What can we do about this?"

"We had time on our wings just when they need drivers. I see no flaw in this plan at all!"

"That's the first dishonest dollar that I ever made."

Deliveroo - Truck driver shortage

'That loud thud you'll hear when you leave the lot is just your new car dropping its value.'

Santa Delivering Amazon Packages

"Glad I took it for a test drive. I'll bet it moved faster on the assembly line."

'You can't expect fame and fortune from selling just your fillet of sole to the devil.'

"Here's a nice one. It was confiscated from a little old drunk lady."

"We balance our low pressure sales with a vigorous add-on department."