Dating Journey Pillows

Wonderland Matchmakers. I'm looking for Mister Juuuust right! Goldilocks joins a dating service.

'Where have you been all my life?'

'I keep looking for a keepr, and all I find are fixer-uppers.'

He wouldn't been a great third date, but not quite worth suffering through dates one and two.

She agreed to marry me, but she has to marry three other guys first.

'Same old line - his smartphone doesn't understand him.'

"Some advice, Tia Carmen...do not check out passing babes."

"Sorry, I'm looking for Mr. Right."

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

Sure, he's a zombie but hey, it's nice to finally meet someone who is more interested in my brains than my body.

'Past performance is not an indication of future results.'

"I'll bet your're a Taurus. Right?"

"May I have this arythmic flail?"

"This is the perfect way to watch movies if you love mosquitoes and having a cold, wet butt."

Life is for the birds.

"Maybe the next one will be a singles cruise."

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

Speed Dating for Turtles

I'm looking for a man who can meet my needs - Cream meringue master-chef.

Romance

Give us a drink that says "we're in love." Oh no, not again. Today's Special. Latte + 1hr web $12.50. We're back together. We're celebrating. Give us my darling pudding pie's favorite drink. A cinnamon mocha latte with a peppermint lollipop swizzle stick. Excuse me?! That is not my favorite drink ... dear. My favorite drink is a cinnamon mocha latte with a spearmint lollipop swizzle stick ... dear. I am so sorry ... snookums. How could I have possibly been so heartless and thoughtless as to con

"...and someone with no fleas. Anything else?"

"Yes, I'm from London. 'Which part?' you ask. Well all of me!"

So Close..

"Jackie, why does your relationship status read ‘capitulated to’ me?!"

"When you say that love is in the air, you're referring to the smells from the food trucks, right?"

Right click for yes...

"Like I could date a guy from Notre Dame."

"I met him on an online dating site. He was on their 'return' section."

"You should be sniffed, and often, by someone who knows how."

'Cow in love'

"I can't decide if we're good people who are bad at communicating, or monsters who communicate perfectly."

Why we need poetry. . .

Carbon Dating.

"She's in a conversationally induced coma."