Dating Explorers Pillows

'Listen, I like you, Chet, but I prefer to move a little slower.'

"He's nice, but he won't leave."

"So how did your blind date go with that mysterious "man in uniform"?"

"For 200,000 years people have primarily only been able to mate with peole who speak the same language."

'It is believed dear Jack finally figured out women. Trouble is he died laughing before her could tell anybody.'

"According to the pollsters I'm your ideal partner."

"How many of these blind dates must we go on before we can start seeing each other?"

"Yes, I'm from London. 'Which part?' you ask. Well all of me!"

Too much togetherness can lead to unexpected problems.

I DATED A GUY FROM THE FAIR, BUT . . .

"I've been out of the dating scene a long time. Is kissing still a thing?"

'Don't let the photo put you off, it was taken when he was under the spell of a wicked witch.'

Online Dating

"Have you tried carbon dating?"

That must be my computer date... (Answers door to robot).

"I'm sorry about all this. It's my animal magnetism."

"Here's one, Matey! 'Must Love Parrots.'"

"And for my next trick, I will confuse general politeness for chemistry."

"I just love a nice knight out."

"The cheek of him! At the end of the first date, he wanted me to go to his home to roost!"

The perfect man

"This sounds promising. . . dark brown hair, loyal, cuddly and good in bed."

"The worst thing about having aliens abduct you is that they say they’re going to call, but they never do."

'Two Mr. Wrongs don't make a Mr. Right.'

"Your online profile says you like to foxtrot."

"Don't panic, she'll be back. We lock the washroom windows from the outside."

"Teri tells me you're ostensibly straight.."

"Don't wait too long for Mr. Right or you'll end up with Mr. What's left!"

"Hi!- standards need lowering?"

Mate Mart

Russian Dating.

Cat Love Ads: "Are you; 'Stubborn, lazy, unfaithful and psychopathic...with no sense of humour?""

"I'm looking for a data plan that will be constantly out of service so I can tell my dates I didn't mean to ghost them."

"She said don't forget the straw."

"Sorry, pal. I just need to make sure she likes me for me."