
'But I assure you - I'm genuinely interested in your brains!'
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'But I assure you - I'm genuinely interested in your brains!'
"Anthony, are you paper or plastic?"
"I don't usually do this on the first date, but do you mind if I take your temperature?"
"I don't understand it! My nerd detector's going crazy!"
Online Dating
'When he said it would be 'me and him against the world' I had no idea everyone was already mad at him.'
"Here's one, Matey! 'Must Love Parrots.'"
That must be my computer date... (Answers door to robot).
"Then again, an honest profile picture would not have got me a wonderful 'Duck Confit with a Chocolat Creme Brulee.'"
"I just love a nice knight out."
"Why don't you move over here, Mr. Lowery, where you'll be closer to everything."
"This sounds promising. . . dark brown hair, loyal, cuddly and good in bed."
"Your online profile says you like to foxtrot."
Barman indicates sick bucket, alongside usual ice bucket, saying to attractive woman: 'That's there in case you hear any particularly bad chat-up lines.'
"I know it's our first date and we're at this fancy restaurant and all, but would it be a red flag if I ordered the chicken fingers?"
"Don't blame me! Your profile said nothing about a seafood allergy."
"I'm not ready to put you on my favorites contact list, but I will add you to a group text."
"Don't panic, she'll be back. We lock the washroom windows from the outside."
"Don't wait too long for Mr. Right or you'll end up with Mr. What's left!"
"Sorry, pal. I just need to make sure she likes me for me."
"Hi!- standards need lowering?"
"I had guys chase my tail, then one day I thought, hey, dummy, get rid of the middlemen and chase your own tail!"
"It's funny how people suddenly come out of the woodwork when they know you're taken."
"I must say, Doctor Jeckyll, that you bear little resemblance to your profile picture."
'Gosh, Cindylou, you can't judge a guy solely on how he eats spaghetti!'
"What if I dress up like a Chihuahua?"
'But enough about me... let's talk about you. Do you prefer plain or ribbed condoms?'
'Your credit card or mine?'
'Frankly, I'm looking for someone who's tall, dark and solvent.'
"I'll be honest with you, Jeannette, I'm looking for a no-load relationship."
Your numerous prescriptions really have improved my love life. I'm dating my pharmacist.
Relate on-line: An error of type 4807 has occurred in your marriage.
Colin knew things were going well when he saw his date trying to make him jealous.
'Yes, this is my first time at speed dating. Is it that obvious?'
'Our relationship is getting serious. He's taking me to meet his doctor.'
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