Dynamic Dater Gifts

"He never calls me, but he always picks up."

'It was love at first sight, although he was very pixilated and I was out of focus'

"Yes, I'm from London. 'Which part?' you ask. Well all of me!"

"...and someone with no fleas. Anything else?"

"Sure, it's more efficient. But I still miss shooting the arrows."

Online Dating

'When he said it would be 'me and him against the world' I had no idea everyone was already mad at him.'

Kissable Frogs in Your Area

'Of all the women who responded to my dating profile, you had the best emoticon.'

Sally and Doug had met online and were proving to be very compatible...

'I was attracted to you but your online photo, but now that I've seen you in High-Def...'

"Ooo... she sounds nice... 'I enjoy burying myself in the sand and sideways walks on the beach.'"

"That guy I just met is already texting me pictures of his plumage."

'Okay, but not in person -- I prefer on-line dating.'

"Don't take this the wrong way, Howard, but I'd like to go back to having an on-line relationship."

Today's love

"Why don't you move over here, Mr. Lowery, where you'll be closer to everything."

'Long distance romances in the twenty first century.'

'I'm sorry, Jason. I don't date anyone new until I've googled them.'

'Take this stick-drive and open the file 'John's Emotional Baggage'. It'll save a lot of time.'

"I thought you did a great job with your gender neutral statements ... There will be a second date."

"I'm not ready to put you on my favorites contact list, but I will add you to a group text."

"This isn't working. We have nothing in common."

"Romeo,Romeo. Are you online,Romeo"

'Speed dating really works! Our first date was Friday, we married on Saturday, and now I'm happily single again.'

Financially Secure Romantic with sufficient fire in belly seeks damsel in distress...

"Can you tell me the story again about how you swiped right on Dad?"

"It's funny how people suddenly come out of the woodwork when they know you're taken."

Online Dating for Dummies

You looked different during our video chat.

"You new personality that you downloaded off the Internet makes you irresistible."

We met online.

"What do you mean asking you to marry me via text wasn't romantic? Did you see the emoji with hearts for eyes I attached?"

"So, do you walk the talk? Replete the tweet? Sext the text?"

'That must be my computer date.'