Dating Dilemmas Appreciator Gifts

What part of "no" don't you understand? The sad part.

'Some have a love life - I have a 'can't-stand-for-the-man-to-be-right' life.'

"You don't know me well enough to not care how I look."

"We met through the personals. We both were seeking someone 'Rubenesque'."

'I really can't stay for dessert. Why don't you stay and DVR the rest of the date for me?'

Dating - "Oh, and she must have a sense of humour."

"Yes, he was very nice, Mom, but he had to cut the date short because it was... 'report card time'!"

"Do you have a boyfriend?"

'I'm tired of roaming the earth. Can we just stay home tonight?'

"You lack spontaniety."

"I'm experiencing bouts of heavy breathing and dizziness when I'm speed dating!"

Biological Cuckoo clock

Couple kissing by a 'Ped Xing and Oing' sign.

'It's hard finding a caring,sensitive and good looking man. Most of them already have boyfriends.'

"Ideally, I'm looking for a guy who can make me smile."

Ostrich Bar

When kissing a woman, try not to burp.

'Are you ready to get hurt again?'

Women's Idea of Sharing/Men's Idea of Sharing.

My personal ad specifically said I was a "dog person who enjoys walks on the beach."

'You remind me of my ex-ex-ex.'

A Tree Grows In . . . Wherever.

"I've become so good at dating—relationships that used to take months now last a matter of days."

'Excellent napkin.'

Couple in Grey

"Ask me anything you want about Water Cress!"

"Brad, if you can't say 'I love you' without using finger quotes, I'm outta here."

I've been going on a lot of first dates lately, but nobody wants to go out with me for a second date on Valentine's Day. The architect made other plans and the banker has no interest in seeing me again. The pilot doesn't see our relationship getting off the ground and the teacher thinks one date was enough --- she said she learned her lesson. What about the dietitian? I thought you two had a great time. We did --- but she's looking for somebody higher up the food chain.

"What if I dress up like a Chihuahua?"

"Yes, we met on a blind date, or in your father's case, a blind drunk date."

Are you honestly trying to play footsie with me? I never mix footsie with honesty.

"I would gladly explain it to you, Allison. But, for your information, it's inexplicable."

"We pointed, but we never clicked."

"I was going to call you but I remembered I left some empty oxygen canisters on Mt. Everest."

Speed Dating