Dating Diarist Gifts

"I thought I liked him despite his affectations. It turned out all I really liked were his affectations."

Telapathy.

'Crabs, sharks, octopi...'

"You owe me five bucks."

'Sorry, but we're not compatible, Jim. You keep a diary, and I blog on the Internet.'

Professional woman in pub

She agreed to marry me, but she has to marry three other guys first.

Collected works

"What was the point of writing a blog that nobody else could read?"

Samuel Pepys' writer's block

"It's alright for you, female worms are everywhere, but when was the last time you saw a Mummy-Long-Legs?"

"I had half a date last weekend."

Snake Blogging,

"It started out as the Great American Novel. Then The Great American Screenplay. . . Short Story. . . Blog Post. . . And now I've got it edited down to a Tweet."

'Hurry up, I'm dying to use the blog'

"...Also, true love is eventually tax deductible."

"Of course I try to communicate with him - I update my blog almost daily."

"Are you seeing anyone?"

'When it comes to romance, Sherlock doesn't have a clue!'

"I'm doing a think piece on me."

Cupid gives up trying to get cell phone-using couple together.

'All my opinions are posted on my online blog.'

'If you want to brag about yourself, start a blog.'

Anais Nin.

Happiness is blogging the first days of summer.

'Oh, I am SO going to put this on my blog!'

'Dear Diary, well, you never know. Today I led the stampede. Imagine my surprise when I found myself out there in front, all alone. Dreams to still come true...sometimes.'

'When I said in my on-line profile that I was athletic, I meant that I like watching sports!'

'Quit fooling with that stupid blog and do some REAL writing!'

"It's another letter from Mr. Wentworth. He writes, 'You up?' and then there are some pictures of a smiley face and an eggplant."

'Can my own tweets be used against me?'

Couple in bed. Man says: 'Are you BLOGGING this?'

"We need to text about our relationship."

'Mom calls this a diary where you write private thoughts no one else can see. What fun is that?'

Like every Tuesday, Dirk spends the evening working on his biography on Wikipedia.