Data Storage Gifts

"It was much nicer before people started storing all their personal information in the cloud."

'Everything is in the Cloud.'

National Archives

'Things just haven't been the same around here since people starting saving files in the cloud.'

'Torrential rains were bad enough when it was just pouring water, but now that people store data in the clouds, it's even worse.'

'This must be the effect of the climate change! Even the data cloud has started to rain!'

Connecting to the Cloud.

'Methinks more like a data storage and processing centre.'

'We're storing our information in the cloud.'

Let's get organized

"Actually, she's just a figurehead boss. Our real CEO is an algorithm floating around somewhere in the cloud!"

Fear/Knowledge

'My name's Google and I'm being inundated with requests for information about every damn thing imaginable, by people I don't even know...It's endless!'

"If i were to kiss you then there is a 17% probability that we might get married and that has a 24% likelihood that we'd have children with a 34% change of divorce...I'm not sure I can risk it."

"Trust me, this is as weird for me as it is for you."

'If I may say so, business is booming.'

Big Data Tonight

"Don’t you eyeball me, Ed! That’s right, look down at the table. Only technicians who remember to back up the data can look at me! And if you start to cry I will fire you!"

'The question is - to what level of data do we wish to stoop.'

"Six out of ten statisticians prefer to be in the majority."

Never tell the boss "You can count on me" during inventory.

"When I grow up I hope to get into data storage."

Gardener's Calendar: Try to put the other things back...

"Bob wait, let's do the survey first! Sir, on a scale of 1, poor, to 10, excellent, how would you rate our chase today?"

'...and what's more, my databank has more data than your databank.'

'It looks like our data.'

"Why does it always have to represent something?"

Information about information about information about information.

"We've stared at the election map for so long it's become a Magic Eye poster."

'I need a lot of trunk space.'

She never said "Da-da." She went right to "data."

'As I see it, it's a toss-up between a Belgian data processing machine and an American electronic computer.'

Information Tightrope.

Businessman dreaming of pie charts when he sees a pizza.

"Is this piece of artwork or a chart of current market trends?"