Darwin Disciple Gifts

Mesozoic era - Cenozoic era

Way too much anthropomorphising

"I groom all day and still look like a baboon."

Moses on the web

'Take it from me and come back. The future is definitely on land.'

'Just ask yourself -- Are you better off now than you were two thousand years ago?'

'Oh, so now the ocean isn't GOOD enough for you?'

"In the same of the phone, the tablet, and the desktop computer."

Fish evolving: 'Write, if you establish a niche.'

'If only Darwin could have seen this.'

Charles Darwin Book Signing.

God's Phone

"I have an app for that."

Evolving/Devolving

"And always remember...If you're going to be sick, always do it on the carpet. It's more absorbent."

'Sorry - The position has already been filled."

Fish eating smaller fish in a tank.

'I'm telling you Dad: Walking upright and using tools is the way of the future...'

"Only three hundred and sixty-seven followers? Maria's not an asset to the abbey."

"Amen. Thanks everyone, oh and don't forget to subscribe!"

'Oh dear. My son's an evolutionary throw forward.'

'No, Father, they're not praying. They're texting.'

Follow God On Twitter

I'd Turn Back If I Were You.

'For your penance, download five 'Hail marys' and ten 'Our fathers'.'

'It's Sundays like this that I regret our church website is so popular.'

'Stop evolving and come in. Your dinner's ready.'

Darwin Updated: Divergent Species and Convergent Species.

"No matter the weather or what's on my plate, I'm here at five. That's discipline."

'Come back, you fool! -- The Earth is three-fourths ocean!'

"Our father who art at www.heaven.com..."