Dairy-free Dieter Gifts

Lactose Intolerant Goldilocks

Freshest ice cream in town!

McMorkim's Cheeses Security A gang of mice wheeling in a giant mousetrap with Pizza and Beer as bait to a Security Guard's post hoping to gain access to a cheese Factory if the Guard is trapped.

Cheeze Wiz.

"I feel like we are the polyester of dairy products."

Where Skim Milk comes from.

The Main Types of Cheese

"I'm afraid it's not cheese, it's 'cheese-like'."

"Grass-cream! Thanks Mum!"

Where 'Pastor'-ized Milk Comes From...

'Say low-cholesterol dairy-free alternative to cheese!'

Where Shaving Cream Comes From

"Wait, what are you doing?"

Cow being force fed hormones and producing milk.

'I think I'm lactose intolerant.'

'It's a great film Pauline, I nearly milked myself laughing.'

"It's completely normal for someone your age to develop a taste for butterscotch."

'Snap, crackle, help! I'm lactose intolerant!'

'Thanks mum, it's just what I always wanted!'

Dairy Devil

Cow and Milk

The worm that churned!

Never give a cow a giant straw.

'I feel like such a failure: They have to process my milk to make it low-fat...'

"Mouse? No. They contain cheese and I'm lactose intolerant."

The Nihilist Deli.

"Cheese is just a substitute for the love you've never given me."

'I'm sorry but I have to let you go, we're all drinking 2%.'

"I'm now too old to produce milk, and I can't afford to retire as yet, so I've had to diversify..."

'How now, brown cow?'

'Remember, chew every bite 32 times.'

'The Ailing Matisse tries cutting out meat and dairy products.'

'I got the job, Mom. You always said I'd make a living with my hands.'

Yoghurt man

The Eighth Day of Christmas