Cybersecurity Jester Pillows

"I.T. says I need a padlock for my PC."

"Is he talking yet? I was hoping he could help me with my new phone."

"We're following Carrot Top."

Password Error: Snow White and the seven dwarfs not recognised as eight characters.

"Phyllis, this isn�t my laptop..."

"Nobody's perfect, but we're working on it."

Hardware and software

Stepping on clown's shoe...

"First the good news - one of us hasn't been made redundant."

'To make up for the decline in snail mail deliveries, I've taken to biting my master every time he gets an e-mail.'

Bad Interview Technique

'You're resigning? What great timing! I was going to lay you off friday!'

"The incessant chatter was driving me crackers, so I got him his own twitter account."

"I think earth's antivirus software expired."

'Make him laugh, make him cry.'

"I think retrieving the info from that harddrive might be a little tricky."

'Phone for help? Are you mad? Have you any idea how much it costs to use a mobile abroad?'

'Keep it under you hat, but I want you to enrich some uranium.'

"I'm popping out for a tinkle."

"I think someone put Bob on vibrate."

'You've been with the company for 20 years Harvey, you make an excellent wage, get 4 weeks paid vacation... I'm going to have to let you go.'

"My Twitter account isn't too interesting. It's mostly just a bunch of threats."

"Honey, our pop-up blocker stopped working again."

'If you don't behave we'll unfreeze your stem cells!'

'The best way to protect your privacy is through a flood of misinformation obscuring the truth.'

I don't like the looks of this.

Nanopsychiatry.

"I only have two apps on my phone. One makes me spend all my money and the other gives me embezzling tips."

'Make sport of the Queen.'

'I'm looking for someone who can make me laugh.'

Travelling jesters. No fools left aboard overnight.

"Hi, I'm the new IT-security-expert! Where is your server room? I want to see if I can overcome your firewall!"

'Ringing in your ears, you say?'

"No, I'm not able to transplant your computer's antivirus software into your body. Try washing your hands more often."