Cyber Jokester Gifts

"Someone has hacked into our Computer."

'Trick or treat. . . and I know how to hack into your computer!'

Beware of Blog

'I told you not to open that attachment..'

'Now that's what I call a virus!

'The genius is that WiFi only stays on for seconds at a time.'

'...and at 2:00 you'll be whispering into millions of ears that it's okay to download that attachment.'

"I'm selling all my old passwords that were stolen."

"Arf is not much of a password."

"Can't you do something more creative than messing around with cupboard doors?"

'Hey, what happened to my cookies?'

'Everybody on the internet now knows I'm a dog, so I'm pretending to be a cat.'

"I've edited your Wikipedia entry again, Sadie. You're about to be inundated with phone calls from the press." "Whatever, geek-boy." "You're now the world's foremost authority on Turkey leprosy, the disease that's threatening to ruin the holidays." "No one'll believe that." "Oh yeah? I wrote a Wikipedia page for Turkey leprosy, too, along with examples of all the historical figures it's killed, such as the Archduke of Crushistan." "There is no 'Crushistan.'" "I've written a Wikipedia entry for C

Press Any Key. No, Not That One.

"I think you should hire me for my vast software knowledge. . . and then pay for me to go learn software."

'I think the computer has a crush on me. It asked me to remain after class.'

"Are you sure this is a 'Flu virus?" "See for yourself...it's nose is running!"

'One placebo or two, doctor?'

Physics Improv. "I now vill be taking suggestions from ze audience..."

'The problem seems to be in the memory bank.'

A fisherman reacts as he sees a drone flying over the lake with a fishing line into the water below.

'Don't you hate it when they look BACK at you?'

"They don't appear to want to take over. They just want to dance."

'Sir, we're receiving a signal from space. It might be a candidate for possible intelligent alien life!' 'Nice going you ninny, you butt-dialled Earth! Now they're going to know we exist!'

"...and we hope that, for a cyber-crime, you will consider a cyber-penalty."

"Information is moved via neurotransmitters from neuron to neuron via the synapses into the brain where it is then retrieved by the memory via a slap on the back of the head."

At first, Moses was worried about the manna from heaven.

'But it may be easier to understand the meaning of bioengineered life.'

"Alarmingly, after five minutes the pool had come no closer."

"I.T. says these new laptops they gave us come loaded with all the latest viruses."

'I was told it required a log-in...'

'Lately, I've been thinking a lot about evolution. My theory is that it all points to 'survival of the fattest'.'

'It's not working because it claims it can think and has decided not to.'

'Reallly Miss Jones...all this fuss over a silly little spider!'

'What are you talking about? ? how can you have half a quantum theory?'