Customer Service Comic Gifts

Before you're released, would you mind filling out this feedback survey, so we may better serve you next time?

'They didn't fit when you got them home? Maybe your contents settled during shipping?'

Grim Reaper rowing a boat full of dead souls to the afterlife; a tip jar sits on the side of the boat.

"Unless one is a humorist, Haskins. One should avoid attempts at humor."

"Good boy, what a good boy. You're hired."

'I understand they specialize in acquisitions.'

'It's easy, Greg. Just get in touch with your inner regional sales manager.'

"I'll tell you, mock jury duty beats cancer testing."

"Recess is over, Your Honor."

'That will be 100 hours of community service in some other community.'

'Your call may be monitored to give us a few good laughs.'

"I like Casual Dining, but this is too casual. I ordered spaghetti!"

"You've been replaced by a new AI program, but we can keep you on until it's finished it's vacation."

"When you promised me 'a set of wheels', I assumed a company car."

If you don't give me a free hot chocolate, you're probably not a patriot. #$%* Fox News.

So you'd like to be a lawyer...we require honest, genuine people, who are prepared to...learn how to fake sincerity.

"Not more sleeve alterations?!"

"Can I have another free biscuit for my dog?" "Sure." "Can you warm this one up? Maybe sprinkle some cinnamon and sugar on it, and maybe make it three biscuits?" "You sure this is for your dog?" "Can you also sprinkle a little turkey on it?"

'Oh, hello Dave. Would you like that in untraceable, used notes, like last time?'

'Hmmm...It is: innocent until proven guilty? Or is it: guilty until proven innocent?'

"In order to raise some working capital, the company has sold your souls to the devil"

In and Out Trays

''Not guilty'? -- oh, in denial, are we?'

"I've had a tip off that someone on the team has been using email."

'You have an over reactive gagging reflex.'

"We only do salads. There's no need to keep warning customers that the plates are cold."

'He's not in now. This is his secwatawy.'

Frank was famous for his anti-inflammatory rhetoric.

'and for pushing your umbrella button in a VERY crowded elevator.'

Bureau of Missing Door Knobs

'Remember Jones, the customer is always right, no matter how stupid and ignorant he may be.'

'My client would like to enter a plea of inanity.'

'Exhibit A: the oxygen tube that came loose the night she died. You were there that night. You wanted to play then, too.'

I rest my case, your honor, in celebration of "Casual Defense Friday." ! !

'Would you like a room on the sunny side, sir? Haha, just kidding!'