Curtain Crosser Gifts

Bank hiding behind a curtain.

Indoor Climbing Centre for Cats.

"I take it you got the lead in the school play."

Drama Llama

Crossing Guard to rabbit at Deer Crossing: 'Not so fast, buddy - you don't look like a deer to me!'

"You're not working as a crossing guard now, Brenda."

A man opens his curtains to wake up his cats.

Little deers

"Getting back across the road is gonna be the hard part."

"All it says is 'DON'T WALK.' When you think about it, that still leaves a world of possibilities, Baby!"

"I find a good way to avoid stress is to close the curtains, climb into bed, and pull the covers over my head."

'If you feel guilty, I can put our high fat vanilla ice cream in one of our low fat cups.'

'A Nosey Cow'.

School crossing

"And don't get me started about being henpecked. Why do you think I crossed the road in the first place?!"

It's the only crossing guard they can afford.

'I told you the next time you crossed me it would be curtains for you!'

School crossing

Lollipop lady

Local drives had been mindful of crosswalks ever since that one guy was dragged to the bushes and mauled.

Forbidden Travel to Cuba

'Why does there have to be a reason?'

'Neighbours is on, love.'

'Rats, just a dirt spot.'

"I find it's better to tell people you're a crossing guard rather than say you're involved in human trafficking."

"Yeah. Well... Who crossed the road first?"

"Yeah, he's not your typical guard dog."

"When Ralph Lauren talks, Wilbur listens