Cultural Foodie Gifts

Belt Buckles for different Jewish foods.

"You call this guacamole?"

"Put out the Asian sates, the Russian blinis, and the Mexican bean dips, while whip up something Korean."

French Ham

The Great Dietary Pyramids of Egypt.

'Oh, quit blubbering about not finding any quality walrus fat in the city!'

'A bird's nest. . . hmmm, I wonder what that would taste like in a soup?'

'I think we should eat out in the hotel tomorrow dear.'

"Despite the oaked tannins and lingering aftertaste, I don't think red pairs well with seal blubber."

"I just explained 'kugel' to him."

"Look, Britney! They started selling chicharones! It's a traditional Latino snack."

"Is blubber a good fat or a bad fat?

"So this coffee shop if your 'hangout'?"

Craft Donuts vs. Craft Beer

And then in Italy. . . "But I really don't like bubblegum gelato."

"Can I get this to go in an organic, locally recycled, eco-friendly doggie bag?"

Meticulously prepared, locally sourced food served on artifacts of a romanticized industrial past, by people who take their fashion cues from daguerreotypes, to adults whose parents still pay their rent.

'Please, could you me to Polish my diet!'

"I know it’s a challenge, but it needs your input!" "...Your breadth of knowledge of different interest groups, religions...cultures!" "Right, so the staff Christmas meal will be a traditional lacto-vegan one at a Thai restaurant sometime in March?" "Do you think the Pagans will be OK with that?"

"There must be a place we can wait on line for an hour before eating."

Lottery - come back to eat here 20 times and you will win million dollar in lottery.

"All good things must come to an end...unless I use both of my giant-size super-pots."

'Are you sure you don't have any Indian blood?.'

Culture clash

"Your old Jewish mother with some pickled herring, sir. To remind you of your roots,"

A tureen of chefs

"We call it 'dish' of the day, but it's actually served on a plank of wood."

'Your tomato ketchup is on it's way, Sir...'

In the Works: Eurocheese, Eurobread, Eurowine.

"Mas agua for the gringos?"

"They're boulettes de viande. They're meatballs. They're balls of meat."

'It's all made by stateless people, wanderers, nomads, whose only anchor is cheese.'

Adam and Eve and Scott

"I'll have the crescent-crab 'purses' and the smoked duck 'hash' – hold the quotation marks."

"Hey, Gary. Lois wanted to know if you’re up for waiting forever for reheated leftovers and sipping warm mimosas intended to ease the pain of poor service amid a cacophony of idiot tourists and 20-year-olds... you know, brunch."