Culinary Courtesans T-Shirts

"It could never work, Richard. I'm going to be a gefilte fish, and you're not."

Squirrels Stockpiling Mulling Spices for Winter

'May future generations forgive you for eating that sausage...'

"Tia Carmen's not happy unless she can send people away with a plate of leftovers for the road."

A couple dressed as a knife and a fork

'What'll it be?'

"Well, there's your problem right there -- you need to sauté the onions in white wine before adding the ginger."

"Honey, close the fridge door while you're thinking!"

'I have a bad feeling about this place, Watson... and I smell a rat!'

Horse meat scandal.

'Before you order, perhaps you'd like to discuss your food issues with our eating therapist.'

'...or, if you're watching your cholesterol, we also have thousand-year-old egg substitutes.'

"What would you suggest as a dinner strategy?"

"Blueberry muffins. My wife made them."

"Our cook is working through a lot of stuff."

"And should you retain us, Mr. Hodal, you'll find that we're more than just a law firm."

'Police. We have reason to believe you've been hacking into your neighbor's computers and stealing their recipes.'

Pick Your Own Baby Lamb Chops

'Care to form a splinter group?'

"Okay, I get the message."

I'm thinking of something in a Cheddar.

'Mom's in the bedroom trying on scenarios.'

"Freshly ground pepper, sir?"

Wow. That WAS a lot faster.

'Self service.' 'How much do I tip myself?'

CIA Cafeteria: 'It's nice of you to ask, but the recipe is classified.'

The 60 Hour Gourmet Recipe For People Who Have Time To Spare And Then Some.

"Would it be possible to change this to something more instagrammable?"

"It's called The Pastry Shop Mystery. A real Whodoughnut."

Olga's Cafeterear

Quartet of Chefs

Impractical Guide to Having Babies: 'How many spoons do you need to feed a baby?'

"The secret was in the sauce."

'Our fry cook used to be a tightrope walker. He works without a hairnet.'

Scrutinising a burger under a magnifying glass.