Cryogenics Enthusiast Gifts

'He was our top salesman. We hope that one day, he will be again.'

'He's been frozen, and left everything to himself.'

In the Year 2525

This Halloween, use props to create a unique jack-o-lanern. Fitness buffs might like a jumping jack. Or you could carve a lumberjack. In colder climates, Jack Frost might be a nice choice. And for something functional, build a jack!

'We froze him until medical science knows how to cure spear wounds.'

Snow is falling...

Alaskan Cryogenic Society.

"Business has picked up since we introduced short term cryogenic stays for the football off season."

A businessman sits behinds a desk with a nameplate that reads "Charles F. Baxter - Previously frozen".

"Blast it, Perkins, not again!"

'I tell ya Frank, if we find one of these babies big enough, we could live forever!'

'I'm looking seriously into cryogenics.'

'You were married to him for 40 years. He never once mentioned he was having his head cryogenically frozen?'

'...and the temperature is controlled by a thermostat which keeps it at a controlled zero year round.'

"I hear they can freeze you until they discover a cure."

"And unlimited freezer space, naturally..."

'The temperature isn't too bad at -15, but when you add on the wind chill factor... '

'Honey, I'm looking fat in white!' 'Trust me, dear. In a few months, the pounds will be melting away.'

"Stick to it. There's a future in cryogenics."

'Am I shivering or giggling?'

"Welcome back, Mr. Bigley. Some messages came in for you while you were dead."

'California: Here I come!'

'We melt you and then, in the future, freeze you, pop in the carrot and voilá!'

"We switched over. It’s cheaper, and polls show sinners are far more miserable in a cold climate."

'Yes, we could use someone with your talents!'

Igloo Building.

"I see Linda and Gay moved back from down South. I knew that wouldn't last."

Ace Cryogenics (Giant toaster).

"I'm so sorry, I didn't realize the water balloons had already frozen..."

Explorer receiving a Valentine from a penguin.

Wintertime Barometer.

1911 - Roald Amundsen thought he was the first man to reach the southpole.

"There go the summer people, thank God."

'I forgot to get show tires.'

"Sure, the Antarctic waters are great feeding grounds, but can we try tropical waters next time?"