Cryogenics Gifts

"Blast it, Perkins, not again!"

'I'm looking seriously into cryogenics.'

'Our program includes a deep freeze, and a giant freezer bag.'

"Apparently, he made a last minute deal with one of those 'cryogenic companies'?"

"I hear they can freeze you until they discover a cure."

A businessman sits behinds a desk with a nameplate that reads "Charles F. Baxter - Previously frozen".

'I'd like to be frozen until health insurance will cover my pre-existing conditions.'

'Okay, I'll fill out the form, but make it quick!'

Ace Cryogenics (Giant toaster).

'I'd like to be frozen until global warming ends.'

'We froze him until medical science knows how to cure spear wounds.'

"Business has picked up since we introduced short term cryogenic stays for the football off season."

Alaskan Cryogenic Society.

'I tell ya Frank, if we find one of these babies big enough, we could live forever!'

'You were married to him for 40 years. He never once mentioned he was having his head cryogenically frozen?'

Californians Abroad.

In the Year 2525

"Stick to it. There's a future in cryogenics."

"Welcome back, Mr. Bigley. Some messages came in for you while you were dead."

'We melt you and then, in the future, freeze you, pop in the carrot and voilá!'

'Stick to it. There's a future in cryogenics.'

'Once once we figure out how to cure them of what they died from, we'll thaw them out and bring them back to life.'

I'm sorry but we do not take bookings for Presidential terms of office.

'What's so unusual about freezing dead bodies?'

'He was our top salesman. We hope that one day, he will be again.'

'Cryogenics, eh? Nice try. Think they'll find a cure before your head thaws?'

"Your food is frozen your sperm is frozen...why shouldn't you be frozen?"

"My only suggestion is we freeze it and hope a future generation can repair it."

"Short term Trump presidency cryogenic stays sure have improved business."

A staff member getting his ice cream out from a Cryogenics body storage container, using it as a staff work fridge

'Your food is frozen, your sperm is frozen - why shouldn't you be frozen?'

Wait Here - Froze in a Block of Ice

'We need to know which era you'd like to be de-frosted in.'

Cryogenic Cookery

'I want to be awakened every year when football season starts.'