Crumble Connoisseur Gifts

"I love the way next door never tidy their garden - it's the perfect source of blackberries for our apple crumble."

"And I'll also take my steak raw thank you."

I was holding out okay, until he made it into crumb cake.

One Man's Meat is Another Man's Poetry

"Vindaloo hot enough?"

'Three weeks of brutal alimony negotiations, Polly, and you settle for a cracker!'

"Joel! Killer crust!"

"They always throw us stale bread, so I've decided to bake my own, fresh break..."

'Strong curry for two and a fire-extinguisher.'

Curling your hair for no reason

Sister to brother: 'It's kind of like alphabet soup, only for numbers crunchers.'

Cereal Tasting.

"D'you remember caramel before it all became 'salted?'"

"Joe's cereal. NPR co-approved."

'You reek of crackers.'

'Apparently the nutrients and the additives cancel each other out.'

Woman Curls Her Dog.

"It's this trend that leads us to believe we should supplement our oil commodities with investments in some of the Earth's rich vinegar and crouton reserves."

'The crepes of wrath.' 'Joad's mobile pancake store.'

A polar bear has slipped and is sprawled out on the ice next to a yellow caution sign that features a slipping figure.

"Careful it's hot." (Colour)

1% Cereal: Now with marshmallow dollar signs.

'...And an extra packet of crackers! It's our Anniversary!'

"Maybe I've been brainwashed, but at this point I do believe I actually want a goddamn cracker."

'Dear father for what I am about to receive I give thee thanks.'

'Can't we have something other than curry for a change?'

Love Birds love loving each other

'Didn't I warn you not to have the vindaloo?'

" 'Chicken Vindaloo for the Hindu Soul' is but the tip of the iceberg in our initial strategy of global expansion."

Baker

'No! Not rare, not medium, not well-done: I want my steak raw! Thank you...'

"Hey dude, when I said curls might help, that's not what I meant."

Sick Of A Low-Carb Diet

"Vindaloo hot enough for sir?"

Crusty Bread