Cruiser Humorist Gifts

'That strange smell, George.. is FRESH AIR!'

'Get the net ready, Alice. I think it's a big one.'

Crew Goofs Off While Out Of Sight

"My wife is the queen of misheard lyrics! Listen to her singing carefully next time: it's hilarious..."

"...for a canal I thought that was unusually short."

"That's the last time I buy a dog from a cartoonist."

"I'm the Class Clown fish."

Japanese Whaling

Captain Hook getting his hook stuck in the rail, again

Well yes, I am a Blue Whale, but that doesn't mean I'm depressed...

"This crew gets 15 miles to the pound of gruel. They're very fuel efficient."

"Will thee not sayeth uncle?!"

"Captain, we've taken on strippers."

"How can you feel queasy, we're barely out of port."

"With the benefit of hindsight, I’d say no, Ed, it wasn’t ‘funny’ letting him steer the boat!"

'David, David, we're sinking! Our water bed has sprung a leak!'

'The trick to scaring surfers is to only show your dorsal fin when you surface next to them...'

Lighthouse powered by batteries.

Man painting MOM on boat

Tom Cruise

'Where do you want to go for breakfast, fancy an Australian or do you want to nip over to Hawaii?'

"Is a six pack enough? I can go back out."

Walking the Plank.

"I was caught and released. But according to news reports, I remain a fish of interest."

'I'm not scaring the fish - I'm WARNING the fish!'

Raft with a 'Caution Wet!' sign.

'We're drifting apart.'

"Hey wader, there's a fly in my sloop"

'That's his new trophy fishwife.'

'I got one this small.'

Fish near-death experiences.

Fisherman tricks a visitor into thinking a huge buoy is a fishing float for giant fish.

So, how are you planning on eating that?

Contended beaver nurses a full stomach having eaten the captains wooden leg.