Crisp Coat Connoisseur Gifts

Dr Templeton liked his coat very well starched

'At least we look cool. Especially with the wind chill factor.'

"I know it's misspelled, but market research shows that cute sells."

'Anorak anoraks'.

Electric Blanket.

"I was ironing the curtains and fell out of the window..!"

"That will be the gold standard by which all other naps are judged."

'Why is laying around watching movies considered cozy, but laying around watching football is considered lazy?'

Curtains haberdashery

"I suffered a stroke."

Pre-Winter Ennui-'Hon, did you have the furnace checked?'

Who's a cutey?

Bats with blankets.

"Just think how much we could save if we switched the heating off altogether."

"My mom got it on. She said you'd get it off."

"Man does not live by chips alone. There's also guacamole."

"Do you prefer lavender scent or strawberry?"

'The fire seems to be drawing well.'

'It has a zip-out lining in case of a mild winter.'

Successful Baseball Teams Rely on a Good Pharm System.

'How does this one feel?'

'Hoo boy, yes! B-o-o-o-ring!!'

"This time it's curtains for you, Black Bart!"

'I know, I left the electric blanket on too long.'

All set for the big sleep, Frank? I'm getting there. I've been storing up fat for the winter. And how about Ernie? He's trying something different this year. He's got wi-fi, a game console and virtual reality googles. He's going to cybernate.

'That's the material I want for our new lounge curtains.'

"It's adjusted for inflation. A dollar a chip."

"Why don't you stop by and stray for awhile."

Shy Man at Party

'Man, I wish she would act her age.'

'I can't tell you what I spent for reasons of national security.'

'Scratching these curtains will be the greatest performance of my life.'

"I've always been a gnome body."

Recombinant DNA Lab.

"C'mon. I've been saving for a rainy day.''