Crisp Enthusiast Gifts

"Man does not live by chips alone. There's also guacamole."

'I had my attorney draw this up. It states that if I choose to rise, I don't necessarily have to shine.'

"Let's go watch TV I hear there are bowl games on."

"That's it. We’re toast."

A Communal Breakfast for the Young

Self Service Restaurant: 'Where do you keep the eggs?'

German Expressionist Breakfast

"Harry—Let's get brunch and day drink."

-'but for a full English breakfast you can't beat Blackpool,sir.'

I'd like to take this menu and shove it where the sun don't shine. But I'll settle for the omelette & hash browns...

"This will be hilarious!"

'Now here's a place I like!'

'Sometimes it's difficult to get their feelings to the surface.'

Waitress to church leader: 'It's your daily bread, Pastor. Remember? You ordered the prayer breakfast.'

Toast: the high energy food

Full English Breakfast.

'The vegetables sat in the crisper for hours...days...a whole week. Then suddenly, the drawer opened. A hand reached in, grabbed the kale, and all you could hear was the sound of...A Garbage disposal.'

"I'll have the egg-yellow omelette."

'And after I'm through, our staff attorney will drop by to assist you with all the pre-nuptial agreement documents!'

Real Estate Krisp Flakes: Location! Location! Location!

Filling the Missile Gap

"Forget about flowers, trust me, bring her honey: It's a sure way to one's heart..."

"I'd like to toast our guests."

Credit Crunch Corn Flakes.

"Great coffee, Carole."

'And that's how to make pancakes.'

'Not gruel, stupid! -- I said find the GRAIL!'

An acceptable level of TV violence.

'How would you like your toast?'

Cereal Tasting.

"I hear you've a complaint about the eggs..."

"I just don't want to be 'that' waffle."

'Anybody for breakfast?'