Crisis Comedy Fan Gifts

'We thought he was providing calm, thoughtful guidance through the financial crisis. Turns out he was just taking a nap.'

'Hey, go find your own executive retreat!'

British savings accounts

Non-Drip ?

'Yes, it's easy to make a mistake in a conduct dismissal, Bob. But as mistakes go this is a big one.'

The Fuse

World-Wide Bank: Economic crisis lands in the in-tray.

Fred's not sure who to call first: 911 or the plumber he should have called in the first place.

"Someone has stolen my identity crisis."

"I shouldn't worry if I were you. You have a habit of landing on your feet..!"

"Actually, this is where there was a slight earth tremor."

Gentleman, things are worse than we thought.

"Not wearing deodorant is not what I meant by 'respect the local customs'"

"John, does this mean you've given up looking for work?"

'You were nagging your husband all over the road. I'll need to see your marriage license.'

'Just hold on! Screaming never solved anything.'

"We'll have to pick this up later. My plane just went down, sharks ate my personal assistant, and apparently I'm winning some kind of surfing competition."

How will this impact me?

'That Noah's some sailor, the World is covered in water and he runs aground!'

"Listen up - today is the first day in the rest of the coronavirus crisis!"

"I suppose one of us should call somebody."

'Quick! The NINE iron!!'

The World Ends Today!: 'Never mind, dear- better luck tomorrow!'

"At least my putting has improved."

"I always put things off until the last minute."

2020 Panic Room

'You've got hopelessness and despair until 3:25, at which time your survival instincts are scheduled to kick in.'

"That's not what you told my screener you wanted to talk about."

Bear Market.

"I can’t chase you today … he’s in one of his moods."

'If the global economy goes bust, there's a middle east war, and ocean levels rise. . .our 'Armageddon fund' will do just fine.'

Banana Midlife Crisis