Credit Warriors Gifts

A man gets attacked by his credit report.

"I’ve combined all your outstanding debt into what we here in the banking business like to call a honkin’ big loan."

U of Debt

"I know this is not a proper job for a PhD, Mom, but I have student loans to repay."

"This statement from your headmaster says that you can easily get a good degree...your bank manager says you can't."

The transparent safe box of Panama

'According to the budget, we'll have to count on body heat to keep the offices warm.'

'I'm not worried about losing my job. I'm worried about keeping it.'

"The only thing that's not gone up is the pound."

"What lead you to growing human tests in a test tube?"

'The scariest story I know is escalating health care costs.'

"If we take a late retirement and an early death, we'll just squeak by."

'It's a type of credit card that self destructs when it reaches the limit I've set for you.'

Student Debt

'I always feel at the end of the day I could've taken credit for more.'

"I know it's not in our nature, but we really gotta stop charging everything."

Man on a unicycle trying to guard credit from nasty 'Bankruptcy'.

'If only you could do this with a cow once in a week, we'd save a lot of money for the food delivery service, Rupert!'

"We got the cactus account!"

Sometimes I feel the company would collapse if we weren't here.

I've managed to get your tax bill down to zero, this year ... however, my bill is $10 million.

"I don't see much borrowing on your credit report but I do see a lot of begging and stealing."

"Somebody in Boise needs my help. Run a credit check."

'Getting back into the market can be stressful. I recommend a portfolio heavy on sleep-aids, tranquilizers, and antacids.'

'Of course I have unpaid loans, what other kind is there?'

"At last they paid off their sub-prime fairy-tale and lived happily ever after."

'Can you believe this bank...? Yesterday they refuse me a loan, today they send me a leaflet for a loan.'

MBA, PhD £100,000 student loan. Please Help.

'How to handle market stress' book being thrown through investments office window.

The sixth college sense. 'I see debt people.'

business illustration

'I'm working on a ten year degree. Four years in school, and six years to pay off my student loans.'

'I may be 40 years old, but I have the student debt of a 20 year old.'

'The side effects are headaches, sweating,nervousness, and a depressed bank account.'

'It's not a punchline to an office joke or TV commercial, Perkins. 'You're Fired' - for real!'