Credit Agency Employee Gifts

'You're rating has been downgraded to junk.'

'You know, you can do this all online now.'

"Would you like something you're under qualified for, or something you're overqualified for?"

'We're an international company, Mr. Zickenbarth. We've got creditors in more than 200 different countries!'

'I'm not here looking for a job. I'm the temp who's replacing you when the boss fires you today.'

'You're in luck - we do have a temporary position in advertising'.

'No trouble at all giving you an overdraft Mr Simkins - have mine!'

'If you don't pay us, I'll tell all your creditors you have.'

No one ever tried to rob the Samurai Bank.

Temp Employment Agency. Ah, I see that you have a short attention span.

'Hello, is that the employment agency? It's about the domestic you sent me.'

Do not feed the clerks.

"Can you perform under pressure?"

'It's your debt to society.'

Corporate Advertising Agency: WEEKLY SCAM MEETING

They stole your identity, but after seeing your credit score, they gave it back.

"Keep up the good work and there'll probably be a nice promotion in it for me."

Black Hole Corks

'Now that they've got a new Pope, there aren't any openings for old guys.'

'There's no interest on your purchase for a year. Then we become VERY interested in your balance after that.'

Overly wordy travel.

'Please send us an optimist to run the sales department, and a pessimist to run the credit department.'

'Relax, you are in doggy heaven. I'm just from a temp service.'

"Of course the extra costs of the 'minimum wage' has had an impact upon our recruitment policies...we have to be a lot more selective!"

First hurdle to getting a loan. Angry woman.

Novox Credit Card Co. stare at picture of their founder - a viking.

'Another casualty of U.S. Rating agencies...'

'I'm the new chairman the temp agency sent over.'

'Employment agency: We have lots of jobs for robots, apps, drones.'

"I like your resume, Andy. It shows you're smart, a good worker and full of potassium!"

Wait a second, that's a toy gun. I'm only authorized to give you monopoly money.

Savings, Withdrawals, Robberies.

EMPLOYMENT AGENCY, 'While my reserve unit was guarding the Iraqi border, an illegal alien took my job.'

'Okay - imagine you're a bailiff coming at me with a repossession order.'

"My most recent position was under a house."