Crayon Connoisseur Gifts

"Ever since we got the Border collie, he colors within the lines."

'How was your day Ma?. . .'

Crayo-Blah

Project Length As Measured In Dog Years

"Unfortunately, once the child contracts Pokémon, he lives with it forever."

"We're bringing the arts and sciences together here by giving crayons to mice."

"We seem to be spending more on defence than on things to defend"

"The university said he was a climate change denier so remove the statue."

'I'm in my Blue period.'

'Things have really livened up down there since You introduced SEXUAL reproduction.'

Assault 'n' Vinegar

"Everything on our menu uses organic, locally sourced, graveyard-to-table ingredients."

'Why me Lord?' '...because yo have animal magnetism Noah...'

'You just don't know when to stop, do you?'

'Yes, can I help you?'

"And that's General Ambrose T. Spangler. He died in the Great Mustache Fire of 1897."

'With all the tanning lotion, sun block and moisturizers, we're more coated with batter than the onion rings!'

'What was that?!' 'A 'Mach'-ing bird.'

Ideas Ahead of their Time

bird interprets modern art

Hang on...I've got WINGS..!!!

"This is a great school but it wasn't my first choice."

'Well, I guess we're the control group.'

Kid with plaster cast being sawn off.

"I made the mistake of telling him that the world is his canvas."

"He's an abstract artist."

Dog Walker

A Witch Consults Her Magic Mirror

Sundar Pichai's first doodle.

'Oh my! He finally proposed!'

"I got a red card for not having enough fun!!"

Corporate Greed.

"You looked a lot bigger on your dating profile."

"I don't know, maybe I'm just being mallowdramatic."

"We'll see how it goes. It's Santa's first year with the genetically modified deer."